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  2. Flotsam and Jetsam

    Inspecting Officer: "How is it your khaki is so much too small?" Stout Volunteer: "It do seem a bit skimpy, Sur. But tailor says as how I'm bound to ...

    Article : 49 words
  3. Sinister.

    "He says he would gladly lay the world at my feet," said the sentimental young woman. That's what he'll do, said Miss Cayenne. "After you're married he'll lay the world at ...

    Article : 47 words
  4. A Great Match-winner.

    Customer: "You told me that this 'oss 'ad won a dozen matches agin some o' the best osses in the county. Why, 'e can't trot a mile in ten minutes to save 'is life." ...

    Article : 60 words
  5. Poor Henry.

    You may have heard of the telegraph operator who, during a slack business hour, desired to borrow a cigarette from a fellow worker on the opposite side of the room, ...

    Article : 361 words
  6. Hot Times In The Old Home.

    According to the Liverpool Post, a local firm, being delighted at the idea that one of its employees was called up to join the Reserves, at once volunteered to pay half his wages to ...

    Article : 110 words
  7. No New Dishes for Him.

    Uncle Zebulon was on a visit to his nephew in the big city, and the two had gone to a restaurant for dinner. They had given their order, and were waiting for the soup, when the ...

    Article : 97 words
  8. A Morning Performance.

    First Dram. Critic: "Why are you looking so sad?" Second Ditto Do.: "Just been to a matinee. Poor Johnson, you know; he was buried this ...

    Article : 53 words
  9. Quite Probable.

    "What time of night was it you saw the prisoner in your room?" asked the defendant's solicitor in a recent suit. "About 3 o'clock." ...

    Article : 84 words
  10. Put Yer 'Ead in, Bunny.

    Daring a block in the traffic near the London Stock Exchange, the other day, a cabman found himself next to a miniature and none too cleanly brougham. "Say," he said, ...

    Article : 112 words
  11. He Didn't Like Vulgarity.

    Major Pom Pom: "Er—in mai opinion, one of the—haw—most pleasing features of the modern pantomime is the otter absence of all vulgarity." ...

    Article : 50 words
  12. The Cunning of the Cossack.

    A few months ago a Russian veterinary surgeon was sent into the Ural district by the Government to buy horses for the army. He had been selected by his superiors because he ...

    Article : 169 words
  13. He Wanted No Lawyer.

    Justice (to negro prisoner): "You are charged with stealing chickens. Do you want a lawyer?" Prisoner: "No, yer honah." ...

    Article : 53 words
  14. Spoiling a Farmer.

    A Chicago business man recently utilised a rather unique method of dismissing an employee. His bookkeeper had formerly been a farmer, and had come to Chicago to enter the business ...

    Article : 123 words
  15. Facts and Fancies.

    "Are you in pain, my little man?" asked the kind old gentleman. " No," answered the boy, " the pain is in me." " Oh, Algernon, I have felt so poorly all day. ...

    Article : 708 words
  16. The Bright Side.

    "There's one beauty in livin' in a small town," said the philosopher, "and that is that your feller citizens will sympathise with you in your trouble. And if you haven't got ...

    Article : 71 words
  17. Misunderstood.

    The tall man came into the room, dangling a newspaper in his right hand. He approached a little group at the end of the counter. "I wonder," he said, "if any of you gentlemen ...

    Article : 185 words
  18. All But the Butter.

    At the University of North Dakota the thirty girl students are boarded in three dormitories, for the institution is out on the prairie, three miles from Grand Forks, the nearest town. ...

    Article : 220 words
  19. "What Ho!"

    Here is a story of an answer given to a school inspector which shows the receptiveness of the youthful pupils in the matter of musicball slang. One of these officials, it is said, ...

    Article : 118 words
  20. Kickers in Church.

    A correspondent writes to a London paper from the village of Wozzle, in Wiltshire: We all had a dreadful shock in our parish church last Sunday. ...

    Article : 439 words
  21. All The Man's Fault.

    There is a man who is saying mean things about woman's chirography. Last week business detained him in town all day. While taking his lunch he received a ...

    Article : 332 words
  22. Her Bargain.

    One of the islands in Panama Bay used to belong to an enterprising old lady from. Connecticut—the widow of a sea captain—and she lived all alone there in a little ...

    Article : 333 words
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