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-^-;-'." ' Z--r-r : - -:-:-:-¡- -?? ? v
I [ HoKs and eomttgnts 11
Untrue that Jimmy Prie» is engaged
in writing a monograph enfcttfad **Fton>
tb» Wash Tab to tb» Work» Depart
mont nud Beek."
. . .
A Sydney correspondent of the
"Sunday Times" Han « look at the
«teamer Koombana in Hort's dock thc
other day. Thirteen of her5" plat««
were broken in her frantic attempts tc
remove sandbanks. She was evident-
ly kept afloat only bv tho top skin ol
her ballast tanks. 'Shis is vastly dif-
ferent from the " only-a-bit-of-Paint
scraped off" version with which WJL
was stuffed at tho tune.
, *< : ? . -"
Jimmy Prios at PrsmanÜe pa Thurs
day i
Be wished that night to dany tba
truth of assertions that had beac
circulated to the affect that he in-
tended to accept a» effie» outslds
tiie State. -He -had no intention qi
accepting euch -office. (Hear,, bear.)
It's manners, Jimmy, to wait till
you're asked. - .
: "Tom MoUoy/* writes, a .co-respond-
ent, "was recently entertained at a
(bruter in Sydney by some of bis old
Westralian friends. The chair was
taken by Horowitz, of ' bankrupt tail-
oring fame. This ought to be cheer-
ful news to Horowitz's çtwditors,*' By
the way; it is alleged that Tom won't
return from Sydney till he sees his
awful arbitration tribunal hull dows
on the horizon. >{/ .
Speaking at the-christening of the new
W-A. S.N. steamer ohyTuçsday; Penne-
father, 3ÍX.C., said:,- that a certain
amount of colored labor was necessary
fof the development jOf. the Nor'-Wfjat.
The Chinese craw of the Minderoo pro-
bably read this in the "West"1 "nejtt
morning, for they promptly waded jm
¿nd 4ried to knótk piftees off thé «econcl
mate. Judging by Jcfeoent examples oj
lawlessness, a certain annjunt yt color»
ed labor in. a community is a fine
thing for Pennefather'^ pwfesjáon.
.? .
A Geraldton paper reports Tom Bath
as having attempted to justify. "*â*e
{arnotts mark-time 'policy by a citation
of the birth statistics during that
lamentable period. Holy femoke ! Any
how,' more babies v are' born in bad
times than in good times, even aa the
birth-rate is higher . Hn poverty^fcriefeeh
India tann it is -in prosperousJjrance.
Tbe poorer the parents, the more pro-
lific they .are as a-sh$>¿ So Tom's far-
fetched argument^ distan** prov* any-
thing except thaï". ^Tom" is a smraÜy
^urnorlesa wight.
. . . /-.. ? .'. . '
Geo. BeUinghem, wiw - ^»reaenied the
South Province in the IW^A, Legisbitive
Councilfrom *o iSfcg, and J. W.
Archibald, who unsuccessfully opposed
Hugh Mahon for ike t^olgeuç4ie Fede-
ral seat in 1901, and l9Qß, aré together
engaged in faun^^'':ló^;.:lDfmm$ «io««»8:
, sion? in .Ei«-; quaintW^assorlfced j»jr
are. Bellingham and, Archibald, who are
being assiBl^^bylsèvepdH'^^' papers
to an: their views.,"¿tn 'ÏSji and -Jfcs.-rer
founces. The ,iSjiJ|#ay:^^"is a lot
mora curious ,%o-:m^r'ml^K^ß Fiji-
ans think of Arghihfdd and BeJlingnam.
' Two criminal cases1 dealt witii last
' "w«c¥? .'.;>*,..'. ':;/,?;?/ -?
Boy of nineteen, ;ne¥er;. been in
trouble before, ^ «teals ^Säß , «heep»
ed servant, robs a" fHaTr*;BowiE»tt
tiooiety of £1^, ^ thefts extend-
ing from November to June. Six
. jnonjhs,- ¿y., t-.;-\,V'-";y v. - .
îâine months lor a'bóy who ,tUfts'' a
few sheep, and si^ mpnths for a maa
who deliberately s^ïi the hardrearp
i#d savings of working men. A dann
able disparity.
. . .
The Vott Bsfäi^M pipar possesses .
^writer who wouldL have; delighted the
heart pf Br. johniOn> ! who made little
fisnçs' talk 'Mf, ,*b*Jas. .ÍÁP tnt;
ample :-» .;';'-'-'"" -
''-The manager vol the; local new-
ly-established . dairy / announces in
. v this issue that ne is-now prepared
. to. deliver the lacteal fluid from th*
mature female bovine animals at
every i^ident's^ftoor, '. daily, at -Sd.
f; per pint." " -f "
.The VSao^ay-'-'n^'?.! f¡p»^, tljat the
manager of the tocal newly-estaoUsbed
cowshed w-ill stick to his contract and
. abstain from doping ;4h» unsuspecting
inhabitants of Hedland. - with lacteal
fluid Burroutitiously, «extracted from the
elderly cap'ricornian quadrupeds which
prowl around the -optskirts of the vil-
lage, and grow fat'and frisky on an
undiluted diet; of spinifex and jam;
tins; v Should be-fail to këèj) his word
the aforesaid newspaper wilt "undoubt-
edly pound him to. pulp with circum-
locutions and polysyllables.
Remarkable how Fat's attitude to-
wards the Political Labor Party bas
changed lately. One time the Labor
member was anathema to the 'corpu-
lent person who lays ap treasure upon
earth, but nowadays Mr. Obesity looks
upon the bowyanged spouter as a man
and a brother. Stoneham, chairman
of directors *>f the Pert&. Tramway
Co.-an arch Tory, if ever there Was
one-spoke . quite enthusiastically the
other day. about the propriety of
Lynch, Bath and rCo.'s taking up
land. The bead of the Tobacco Trust
is a close pal and business associate of
J. C. Watson's. London Conservative
papéis like the ^Mornirg Post", are also'
exceptionally kind, to Fisher and Co.
On the other band tiie > " Labor
Leader" is surlily 4 unfriendly, and de-
clares there is nothing distinctively
Labor about the Fisher policy (the
Sunday Times " dimly recollects
having said the same thing - months
ago). Tommy Bath and his friends
ought to be quite delighted with the
progress they are making with the
hupper suckles. . All the . same, it
seems - an age since the Labor Party
did anything really useful for "the
workers.
The Government has given up the
idea of establishing freezing works at
Wyndham. Had it dropped the sub-
ject with a bang 12 months ago, it
would have saved at least one seat at
the elections.
. . .
The city lighting arbitrators took
two days and a half to examine
Jimmy Wright, the architect, with re-
gard to his valuation of the gas com-
pany's plant. The arbitrators, um-
pire, counsel, solicitors, witnesses and
stenographers ought to stand up at -
the close of each dav's Searing and
sing; "What Will the" Harvest Be."
. . .
A contemporary reports a councillor
I as sayhig :
" Collectively we are either a
I gang of thieve» or a gang of fool«,
for every deal we raak« it a badi
deal for tba oj tisana,"
A Forth councillor ? Mo, Sydney i
The Perth bumble«, aa «very one
know», ara Artmirabio Crichton* all,
and the salt ol the oar th.
. ". ; .
Tb« eUy »oliaitor obligingly notée
that tbs ''wíraaharB to myself and Mr.
Stawell"' in connection with tho arbi'
tration tomfoolery ure, respectively,
tea guineas «ad sevtea jfulßö&s a day.
This, of eourae, is in addition to the
enormous suma cUatributed amongst
the arbitrators, umpire., coima cl, and
other people engaged in thesa truly
edifying proeaediftga. " Myself and
Mr. Stawell," aw, obviously, doing
thetas el ve» real proud. Eighty-five
guinaas a weak an a steady job will
. buy , ajay amount of piok'nu>-up« ¡ for
j **myialf and Us. Stawell,*'
'?. . ?+?
Extract from a "Sghting speech" der
livered fey Troy, M.IIA,, up Geraldton
way ;
Tb* bulk of the peopW te-d*y
would not Save a vota but for thé
Labor Party. Thew wm a, time
wheo a eraat body of the workers
von tera, but they bad. amargad
from that condition; and the credit
for it was due to the Labor Party.
This jsn't merely clotted nonsense,;
such as one usually expects from Tsoy;
it is an ,-insult to the intelligence of
tile public and an outrage on the
memory of the illustrious dead who
toiled and wrought and hied for the
people before the Labor Party waa
thought of. Somebody, ought $o Jend
Troy a volume pf; English or American
history-4hat is, jf the man is capable
of reading anything.
, Extinct from a report issued by the.
Canadian Lamigration Department bp
London :
Special attention ie drawn to the
fact that whenever an ipaanigrant
has within, two years of his or her
landing in 'Canada become a public
charge pr an inmate of a peniten-
tiary, ffapi, prison, or hospital or
other charitable institution, he ox
she may, under existing Canadian
Law, he deported, together with all
those dependent on hrm^or hejrafter
- investigation of -itíbé'?.'?4B**BÚ''' V
-High time this country followed
Canada's example. Why . should the
taxpayer hàvé to keep imported cxbxù"
nais and dead-beats Î
Ü" .. .' . , .
* Sir Dani Cooper, "harli., who died
in England recently, was the son of
the ' first Australian licensed to sport
thé bloody hand of hereditary knight-
hood. Dan'l, whose old man was baro-
neted in 1863, -was a better ad. ipr
Australia than some of his' kind, see-
ing that there were np lash or leg
irons in his pedigree. But be wasn1*
.much use to" his native country, for
the huge income- he " drew fronv New
South Wales inostiy \went tbj^rovld^
him -with horses to run at ^ewrnarhet
and yachts to race at Cowes. Dan'i's
great ambition was to win the Derby,
? which "he never did. He was 61 when
he died, and hi« younger -brother gets
the title. , -
W.A.'e self-elected delegates- to the
Imperial Press Conf erence cat no ice in
London: The présent writer has
dredged a score of papers ipr their
photographs in vain (albeit portraits
of Miirk M'Cohen and Theodore Funk
are as common, as gooseberries, at
Covent Garden) and at least one Ver-
acious journal refers to VDr," Hackett'^
poor old newspaper as jthe " '? Western
Australian/ Perth." .They don't seem
to have done anything or said any-
thing to lift them above the obscurity
of the "also attended " section. And
doubtless the other delogates will go
home with the erroneous impression
that the journalism of this State is as
humorless as Hackett and as funereal
as Kirwan, and as insignificant as
both. v
. . .
Interesting chunk of evidence from
the proceedings of the Sewerage Com-
mission, The witness (Hickson) had
explained that there was something
radically wrong with the Norfolk
street sewer :
Bid you ever examine the work
yourself ?-No, I,did not. I exam-
ined the work from the top, but
never looked through the pipe.
What was the use of looking 'at it
from the top ?^-It was such a very
small job that I did hot give much
time to it. '
He didn't give much time to it. The
man was responsible for the job ; it
was his business to see that it was
carried out perfectly, and he stands up
in public and has the effrontery to
admit that " he didn't give much time
to it." lt would seem that the State
has given far too much time to Hick-
son.
. . .
The unspeakable "Monkey Brand "
Brown of Geraldton-the Chesterfieid
ian ex-politician who was ' substantial-
ly fined for spitting in an opponent's
face-has reappeared in the limelight
to accuse a local tailor of sweating.
The elegant " Monkey Brand" is re-
ported to have let himself loose for
quite half-an-hour ou the alleged
sweating proclivities of the firm to
which Snip belonged. The latter
didn't take the aspersion lying down.
He laid aside his scissors and tape
measure, and reached savagely for the
peD. He indited a virulent letter to
the local "Guardian," in which he
wrathfully denied the imputation. He
pointed out with fierce exultation that
the accusatory Monkey Brand was
himself a customer of the firm. He
drew attention to the fact that the
unabashed Brown was actually wear-
ing one of the defendant firm's suits
at the very time he delivered his
acidulated tirade. Finally he remark-
ed, with triumphant venom, that
Brown was a political imposition and
a social disgrace, and the best thing
he could do was to piece together the
fragments of his battered carcass and
sidle away to the obscurity from which
he should never have emerged. Where-
upon, there was joy in Geraldton that
night, as the poet remarks.
$